As I’ve demonstrated (here and here), an underpinning belief of complementarianism is that the source of feminist resentment is sinful men, men who are not sufficiently nice and accommodating. As Pastor Chandler explains, if men are good enough women can’t even be tempted to rebel:
…where men exercise biblical headship, where they are sacrificially loving, they are creating environments that honor and uplift the name of Jesus Christ, they’re establishing a place where the Word of God is seen and honored, and we understand God as he has revealed himself, and where they provide for, where that happens, and where women come underneath that, the idea of male headship might be attacked as a philosophy, but if they came into our homes, our wives would not want to be freed from anything.
In Cherishing Your Marriage: Part 1, the CBMW asks:
In practical ways in your marriage relationship, how do you balance gender equality with male headship?
Mary Kassian provides the answer. Kassian explains that she doesn’t feel the feminist urge because her husband “guards her equality” (emphasis mine).
Brent and I have been married for almost thirteen years. In that time, he has always honored, blessed and encouraged me. He has never, ever said or done anything that would give me the impression that I am lesser than he. He trusts me completely, and gives up much on my account. When he fails, he is quick to seek forgiveness. I am left with the impression that he regards my desires and interests as more important than his own, and I feel cherished.
Therefore, the question of male-female equality has not been an issue in my mind. I am secure and confident in who God has made me as a woman. Brent upholds and guards my “equality” so I do not feel the need to do so.
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