Deep Strength pointed out a blog post by NYC Pastor which has feminists (Christian and otherwise) up in arms: 10 Women Christian Men Should Not Marry. As Deep Strength notes, there is a massive imbalance between the 643 (and counting) comments the post on selecting a wife has generated and the mere 26 comments on a similar post on selecting a husband the author wrote previously. In fact, the post on selecting a husband received only one comment prior to the publication of the post on selecting a wife, and this one was an objection to headship in marriage:
I agree with most of those statements except for the husbands controlling their wives part. In theory it should work out if the man is godly and good. However, there are men that will take advantage of that statement and use the Bible as a means for covering up abuse, neglect, rape, and whatever else to claim his “dominance”. Better I say, to have the relationship an equal partnership, lest one take advantage of the other.
As is so common, the uproar on both posts is that Christian women are called out. There is no outrage when you call out Christian men, and in fact doing so will make you wildly popular with Christian men as well as Christian women. But calling out women, including Christian women, is extremely difficult and will result in an extended emotional outburst. Making this worse, it feels heroic to call out other men, and it feels cruel to call out women. Thus, when faced with the choice of doing something which is easy and feels heroic, or something which is very difficult and feels unkind, it isn’t surprising that men will nearly always focus their criticism on other men, and do whatever it takes to turn a blind eye to the sins of women.
However, it is important to remember that this is unkind and unloving to women, and it involves a terrible lapse of leadership by Christian men.
See also: Single mothers and the failure of Christian men; it is time to Man Up!
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