The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

That’s it. One more symbol soon defiled, just a few to go. After attacking numerous European figures in film and series, twisting the history of the Ancient Greeks, Romans and insulting Nordic folklore and Medieval Britain, our favourite tribe of innocent Vietnamese peddlers decided that it was time to tear down one of the last remnants of white masculinity, the charismatic, blue-eyed James Bond.

Idris Elba lately tweeted a picture of himself captioned “My name’s Elba. Idris Elba” as a nod to a rumour that has been gooing on for months.

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

The name is Bond, Bail Bond.

Although it is not confirmed, I believe Elba has been given the green light by his hand-rubbing masters to taunt us about the programmed death of that inspiring, objectively White character.

The sky is green and the sun is cold

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

Heimdall VS Heimdall: Enriched

Elba is not just any black actor. He has been a useful stick chosen by the treacherous Finns to poke European culture in the eye, particularly when he portrayed the guardian god Heimdall in Thor, the Hollywood parody of Viking mythology.

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

A sketch of James Bond, as commissioned by Ian Fleming

James Bond, being the son of a Scotsman and a Swiss woman was not, and never will be, Black. James Bond is, as its creator described:

“…slim built; with a three-inch long, thin vertical scar on his right cheek; blue-grey eyes; a “cruel” mouth; short, black hair, a comma of which falls on his forehead”

It is all so tiresome

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

I can’t wait for the sequel of Schindler’s list, starring Woody Allen as the SS officer and Dolph Lundgren as Itshak Stern but something tells me it will not happen anytime soon.

I find the directors of this future Bond film extremely intolerant. Indeed, they think that a Black man has to fit in the role of an oppressive White devil, instead of having his own version of Bond in Wakanda, for example.

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In addition, Bond will be depicted as an evil heteronormative, able-bodied membre of the patriarchy. We need a transexual midget male-to-female Bond and we need it now!  #NotAllBonds!

At least the friendly film purveyors, in their eternal arrogance, stopped being subtle and even the simplest mind can clearly see the motives behind the decision.

Let’s hope that the crowd behind James Gunn’s removal will find a way to torpedo Elba or his handlers.

Bond is everything they fear and hate

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

It was really too much for them to endure this problematic figure of the cool and unapologetically masculine European hero that inspired and keeps inspiring millions of young men to seek their inner alpha.

Hence why he must not only be destroyed, but replaced. Although I am certain that his love interests will not suddenly become “exotic”. On the contrary, those women will have even fairer traits than before, thanks to the thoughtful Quechua recruiters in charge of the project.

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

#BlackBondRightSideOfHistory

I can hardly wait for the realistic scenes where Idris T’challa Bondatrius the Third tries to sneak into a Siberian nuclear plant, fooling the guards by giving the password with a perfect Russian accent. Because We Wuz Russians, wuzn’t we?

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

No, my esteemed colleague. The reactor is THAT way!

I have no idea how the puppet masters will spin the plot without the audience worldwide bursting in laughter at the sight of a Black James Bond, trying to be believable.

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

White guilt does not work everywhere

If they go ahead and fund the film, and I sincerely hope they do this mistake, they will fail and sink the franchise, just like with Solo, Ghostbusters, and other PC failures. In the event of this farce to take place, I would obviously invite ROK readers to boycott it, as they did with the last Star Wars. The amount of Kemetic screeching it will cause shall be pleasant. It is the only language they understand.

Instead make yourself some vodka martinis and watch again the classic James Bonds for some instant, raw alpha attitude. Let them unveil their master plan to all, for this bait is this time to big to take.

Fumiers de marchands, vous êtes démasqués !

The Next James Bond Is Rumored To Be Black

We should fight fire with fire and start our own crowd-funded movie project. Why not an adventure-packed biopic with Roosh to portray Martin Luther King, where he would team up with Nelson Mandela (myself) and travel back in time to discover why it is always the same small group of Bosnian market dwellers that keeps being kicked out of countries? I think we have a blockbuster right there.

Read More: When James Bond Met A Lesbian 


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