Four months ago, I decided to go to Colombia, despite not knowing a single soul in the entire country. At the time, my Spanish was weak, but I was also on a roll romantically. And I was itching to spit some game in Spanish.
Only an hour after landing, I met a beautiful latina with a tight, curvy body and a beautiful smile. Camila was the manager of the Airbnb I would be staying at.
Due to the situation, I mentally put her in the friend-zone. Nevertheless, excited to practice Spanish with her—we immediately hit it off—and talked far longer than her job required.
Fast forward to my first full day in Colombia. It was a Friday. After knocking out my work, I bustled out of my place. I wanted to explore—and to mingle.
I quickly saw a cute Colombian sitting on a bench
She was a petite girl with a nose piercing wearing bright red reading glasses, and, upon getting closer, she also had a devilish look in her eye. Perfect. I introduced myself in my broken Spanish. Her name was Alexandria.
I tried to tell her I was a lost gringo looking for directions to walk back home—to the USA. I don’t think she understood my joke. But we kept talking.
I tried to tell her she looked cute, which I liked. She understood this. I then shared she also looked dangerous, which I was reluctant about.
My first attempt at a little push-pull in a foreign land
I’m sure I was wearing a smirk, enjoying every minute of the uncertainty. Despite having massive trouble understanding one another, we got on well. Being in a completely new place, chatting up this cutie, had me feeling amazing.
And for her, she was curious about me. I figured it was because I had some game and because I was foreign. She later told me she was also interested because I was “muy divertido,” or very fun.
We talked for about twenty or so minutes. Then, keen to explore more before the sun set, I grabbed her number and left. From there, I did a few daytime approaches, but nothing materialized.
Then, around dinner time, I received a text. It was from the cute manager of the Airbnb. She wanted me to go out with her later. Only 24 hours deep into my time Colombia—and without other plans—I accepted.
Upon arriving at the outdoor bar, I found Camila siting next to a cute woman and another guy. We all hit it off immediately. A lot of laughs and a few drinks later, Camila was extremely touchy, and very flirty. If I wanted to hook up with her, the signs were there. And they were only becoming more blatant as the time passed.
I continued to tell her we were, “solo amigos,” or just friends. This seemed to only make her more touchy and more physical. Then, we went to another bar, this one was indoors, and louder. Immediately, Camila escalated more, grinding on me and whispering naughty, delectable Spanish in my ear.
I was torn
This fun, sexy Latina with curves seemed ready. But I work from home, and with plans to live in this Airbnb for the next three months, I willed myself to excuse myself.
This turned out to be the right move—as she had a boyfriend / business partner directly connected to the Airbnb social circle I’d soon become deeply acquainted with.
Yikes.
Anyways, a week later, Alexandria, the first girl I cold approached in Colombia, and I found ourselves in my bed.
After a long night and good sex, I suggested she go. I told her I’d get her a cab—but she said she’d pay. Clearly, she wasn’t upset. Over the coming months, I only continued to enjoy being away from home more and more.
Here’s five things I learned from that first trip…
1. Tone of voice matters more than what you say
And while you and I both have heard about this principle, Spanish made me strongly focus on this area. Less fucks given on the content, and more focus put on either communicating in a playful tone of voice, or in a breaking rapport tone of voice, depending on the context, served me extremely well.
Besides good body language and eye contact, zoning in on tone of voice was probably the number one key that helped me consistently pull new women back to my place throughout my trip, despite being shit at Spanish.
2. Lacking fluency is no excuse
In fact, not having my verbal game forced me to sharpen my non-verbals, like eye contact, body language, non-reactiveness, and tone of voice. Which leads to the next lesson I kept being reminded of…
3. Having some game makes traveling exponentially more fun
Whereas many English speaking male friends I ended up making felt challenged and stifled romantically—especially around Colombian women, being able to enter a foreign land and hit the ground running makes the adventure and the experience far better.
Get social momentum before traveling. Without some momentum, I’d imagine the first impression you’d get of the new place would be far worse. And the last thing you want to feel is isolated and alone—thousands of miles away from home.
4. Staying non-needy and non-reactive is a universal trigger of attraction
Of course, right? But it’s so true. When you can barely understand one another, I found that the non-verbals become even more important. It’s harder to speak your way out of a self-imposed blunder.
Your ability to maintain tension, not respond to her text right away, and stay calm when a woman tests you cannot be understated—regardless of her culture.
5. If possible, build your social circle
If you’re going to stay in the same location for a period of time when traveling abroad, invest in building your social circle. In the months following my story, my social circle turned into an solid source of fun. And it helped me tap into extra dating opportunities.
Travelers are adventurous. Being away from their families also forces them to extrovert. They’re down to meet cool people.
While I don’t recommend giving up cold approach and trying to supplement your dating results with social circle, a combination treated me really well. As you know, one complements the other, and vice-versa. With that, if you can, go explore my friend.
Read More: 5 Things I Learned From My First Trip To Europe
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